The BOFH FAQ

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Congratulations on sending me mail, it getting here, and you getting a reply!
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This is the Bastard Operator From Hell (and other) FAQ file v1.5 (Beta)
created
in response to the sporadic queries I get regarding things I write and post to
Usenet News.  You have received it because either:

	A. You asked for it
	B. It looks like you want some information from it
	C. I know you're paying for every byte you receive
		(which means you'll get the 2000 line version)
	D. You're a postmaster and the person I sent it to passed a bad
		return address to me.
	E. Extra Terrestrial Activity.

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	Q1.  Can you mail me BOFH/Quantum Optics/Part 4 of xxx/Party Dude/etc?
	A1.  No

	Q2.  Can you tell me where to get BOFH/etc?
	A2.  Possibly.  It should be available on Anonymous FTP at the
	     following site.  It may not be up to date at all tho:
		cathouse.org		in	/misc/fun/humor/simon/
	     Also, my WWW archive is fairly complete.  (See Below)
		
	Q3.  How many BOFHs were there?
	A3.  Well, it's a little grey for me, but to my knowledge there was:
		2	pre-BOFH texts (Striped Irregular Bucket Series)
		~15	BOFH real
		2	Bastard System Manager from Hell
		2 or 3	Bastard Operator from Britain
		1	Last Bastard Operator from Hell
		1 more  Bastard returns briefly
		1 more Bastard goes to the Trade Show.
		(There's probably a discrepancy as I didn't keep a hot copy
		the whole time so I may have missed one somewhere.
		There were two "full" reposts to my knowledge:
			"The Executive Relief Repost" and  (prior to BOFB)
			"The Penultimate REREPOST" 
		The Penultimate REREPOST (or REPOST) is the last compilation
		available, so if you have that, you have a major part of it.
		10-Jun-1995.  1 more "The Bastard's still about"

	Q4.  Will there be any more BOFHs?
	A4.  Not that I know of.  I doubt it, but you never know what the
		hell will happen when I'm bored.  Don't bank on it tho.
		Late Note:   Could be.

	Q5.  Is any of it true?
	A5.  None of it.  P.s.  You have a lot of free disk now.  Don't thank
		me, it was my job.

	Q6.  Why did you do it?
	A6.  At first because I was bored.

	Q7.  Did you ever *really* do any of that stuff?
	A7.  Ah.... ...  no.

	Q8.  Can I use the BOFH in my magazine/newspaper/book?
	A8.  What the hell.  The only things I ask are:
		0.  You acknowlege copyright
		1.  You acknowlege the author (me!)
		2.  You don't edit it in any way (If it sucks, don't use it)
		3.  If your magazine/newspaper/book is earning a truckload of
		    cash I'd like to see some of it!!!  ;-}
		4.  If you're not getting a truckload of dosh, I'd still just
		    like to get a copy of your magazine, book, paper whatever,
		    just to know how it's travelling.
	     NOTE:  The Electronic Rights of BOFH are owned by Datamation
		    Magazine or their publishers.  I would prefer that people
		    who have electronic versions record this.

	Q8a. What's the copyright situation?
	A8a. I retain all copyright on my stuff unless otherwise stated

	Q9.  You convinced me.  Where can I send the truckload of cash?
	A9.  To me!:	Simon Travaglia 
			P.O.  Box 13018
			Hamilton,
			New Zealand

	Q10.  What if I haven't got a truckload of cash?
	A10.  Join the club.  I collect cameras...  (Pentax K1000s by
	      preference)